First dates can be a little uncomfortable, to say the least. Many people avoid dating all together because that darn first date is so horribly…vulnerable.
But what can you do to make a first date (dare I say) actually enjoyable? And don’t worry: I won’t give trite advice like “just be yourself.”
The dating tips below are easy to implement and will ensure both parties comfort and enjoyment…I promise!
Focus on him or her. Most people inherently like talking about themselves. Work this to your advantage by asking questions and staying interested in the responses. Avoid big, broad questions (“What are you doing with your life?”). Get specific yet keep it casual and fun.
Need suggestions?
“What do you like to do on your day off?”
“What music do you like to sing to while in the shower?”
“Who was your favorite teacher and why?”
“What’s your go-to meal if you’re cooking for the evening?”
Be open. Okay, that almost sounds almost as trite as “be yourself” but bear with me for a second. Being open doesn’t simply mean being open-minded (though that’s important too); it also means staying physically open. Try not to close off, by folding your arms or crossing your legs too tightly. If you find yourself slumping, gently pull your shoulders back.
Send a message that you’re relaxed and receptive. This makes both parties much more comfortable.
Dare to flirt a little. For many of us, flirting is like a muscle that needs some strengthening. If you’re interested, show it! Flirting is good for you. It reminds you that have “game” (we all do) and can show it.
The following signals are “light” forms of flirtation to spice up your first date:
• Prolonged eye contact
• A brief touch on the hand while conversing
• A warm, inviting smile
• Laughing at a well-told joke
• Freely giving compliments
These actions not only remind you how to flirt but it’s flattering to the other person as well. Why? Because everyone likes to feel heard and admired, right?
The takeaway? Yes, first dates can be horribly awkward. But they don’t have to be. A little planning beforehand certainly helps take the edge off.
Figure it this way: it’s a privilege to spend time with another human, even if he or she isn’t “the one.” It’s a chance to share, communicate and focus on each other (and not our phones) for a little while!